“It’s not what you do; it’s why you do it that makes the difference.”
There are plenty of books that I can read through in just one or two days. However, when a book takes me nearly a month to finish, it is a strong reminder of the depth of self-reflection it triggers. Each time I come across something relatable or intriguing, I take a few days to introspect on how that particular aspect has influenced my life. From childhood traumas to unresolved conflicts with loved ones, there is so much to ponder and heal before moving on to the next passage.
“Childhood experiences of shame change who we are, how we think about ourselves, and our sense of self-worth.”
“Daring Greatly” has been on my TBR list for a long time, and to be honest, I finally started reading it after keeping it on my shelf for almost a year. The author demonstrates in her writing the thoroughness of the research, combining her personal experiences with the stories of people who participated in the study on shame and vulnerability. I am so grateful to myself for setting a goal to finish reading the book by the end of 2023. I now have clarity on the kind of person I want to be, what my values are, and how I want to move forward in my life in 2024.
“When you honor what you have, you’re honoring what I’ve lost.”
The author referenced one of Theodore Roosevelt’s speeches at the beginning and end of the book. Initially, I didn’t grasp the essence of it, but as I progressed towards the end of the book and revisited the quote, I gained a profound understanding and now have a deep appreciation for the lines. The lines are as follows:
“It’s not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and short-coming.
But who does strive to do the deeds; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly..”
~ Theodore Roosevelt
In today’s world of social media, people usually share only the good parts of their lives, and sometimes, they even make up happy moments. But not everyone realizes how this can affect those who see these posts. To protect myself from feeling bad about comparisons and negativity, I always try to remember to appreciate what I have in life. I focus on doing my best in everything, no matter what others think.
It’s important to understand that people around us often talk more about what we do rather than thinking about their actions. So, I stay thankful for what I have and work hard to be my best, avoiding the trap of always comparing myself to others on social media.
“Being rather than knowing requires showing up and letting ourselves be seen. It requires us to dare greatly, to be vulnerable. Sometimes the bravest and most important thing you can do is JUST SHOW UP!”
It requires a lot of courage to put ourselves out there and allow others to see us for who we truly are. Trust me, everyone feels the same level of fear. Some are just good at concealing their anxiety, while others excel at pretending. Although this is not a judgmental observation, it is one of the truths I encountered in 2023. To embrace vulnerability, we must dare greatly by acknowledging our mistakes and actively working towards progress.
“There’s nothing more important than having the courage to say, ‘I don’t know,’ and ‘I messed up’ – being honest and open is key to success in every part of our lives.”
Being open and vulnerable is very hard for people like me, especially when someone I like is involved in it. I am scared that if I show my scars, the person will leave me. So, I always end up keeping a brave smile face and act as if everything is alright in my life even when it is not. But, when it comes to others, I tend to make the people feel comfortable to let them show their scars and assure them that no matter how deep their scars are, I am going to be by their side and work towards healing them. According to psychology and Instagram reels, it goes as: “Emotional People tend to fill up their void by trying to fill others” (not sure how accurate I am). Recently, I changed my approach to handling these situations.
“If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice. That’s the paradox here: Vulnerability is the last thing I want you to see in me, but the first thing I look for in you.”
Daring Greatly has something to offer for everyone, be it a student, parent, or industry professional, etc., It is hard for anyone to not relate at least one paragraph from the book and realize how some of your life experiences have influenced some of the decisions you make to date.
As I finish reading the book, I am going to take the following lines from one of the passages as my affirmation as I enter into 2024.
“No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging!”
To describe the book in one sentence:
“Daring Greatly means finding our own path and respecting what that search looks like for other folks.”
While I finish reading another book…
With Gratitude,
Teja Sree Goli 🙂
